I noticed two other disturbing things about this book. Briefly check out the table of contents.
Now that this book is widely known, it means that a lot of men are exposed. We're now better equipped to recognize the crap they dish out to females. Problem is...I saw myself doing the same exact things as some of the guys in the stories of the book. I've used the same excuses. So, this means I'm exposed as well. Here's some of the crap I've dished out in the past:
1. I don't want to ruin the friendship. I'll know within 10 minutes of meeting you if I like you that way or not. Anything else, and I probably thought you were below my par to date.
2. I just want to take things really slow. Usually code for "Please don't ever try to kiss me because I find you physically repulsive" or "you constantly have some baaaddd donkey breath."
3. I've just been so busy lately.
Guess what? I have always been able to find time to go out with a person I was really into. I will reschedule as much as possible to get to be with you. And if for some odd reason I did actually have a hectic schedule that week/month, this is what it will look/sound like if I really am into you and not lying:
"You know Bob, I do want to go out this weekend! But on Friday from 6:00-9:00 I'm eating with my family, Saturday at 10:00 am I'm meeting a friend, 3:00 pm hair/brow appointment, 6:00 pm mentoring activity, 9:00 movie with girlfriends. Sunday I am going to go to Dallas. Bob, these are things that have been scheduled a long time ago and I would feel awful about rescheduling with my girlfriends. I would change the 3:00 hair/brow appointment but as you can see from my Andy Rooney brows I am in dire need. (I'm a 3-4 haircuts/year person) You can either see me between these specific times, unless you want to go with me when I'm really tired, or we can wait until I can devote more time to you. It's your choice and I'm very sorry. I'm not usually this busy."4. I am just really stressed out and have a lot on my mind. I do have a lot on my mind--Seinfeld episodes, music, my dog--nothing that includes you because I don't like you.
5. I'm just not really much of a phone person. Sometimes this is true but usually it means you're boring on the phone and can't hold your end of the conversation and I can't do all the talking all the time.
6. My social plate is really full right now. ha ha ha ha ha ha! It waxes and wanes but I'm completely in control of how much or how little I want on my plate.
7. I just got out of a relationship and I'm not really sure I'm ready for anything yet. See...this one's tricky because if I did just get out of one, I probably wouldn't even go out with you in the first place because I would still be getting over Mr. X. It's also usually code for, "I think you are really stupid" or "you are WAY below my par"
8. I'm afraid to get hurt emotionally yet again. Could be true sometimes. Like at this point in my life I'm afraid of being in a relationship that I think if going great and then just being dumped at what seems like random. Amanda calls this the sneak attack-I like that name. But...if I really really really like you, I'll get over my fears fast.
9. I just need someone a little more stable in their life path right now. That's my code for "you are a loser and I think you're going to stay that way" or "you are psychopathic" or "you need to get a better job than at McDonald's" or "you have too many money problems."
10. I'm just not really sure what I'm looking for in a guy. Just a flat out lie. I know EXACTLY what I want! That's why when I found one, it sucked that he didn't want me back. sigh. Oh well.
What excuses have YOU used to get out a relationship? The bigger quetsion here is should I continue to make up crap to get out of them or just simply tell the truth, "I'm just not that into you," which honestly might hurt more?