The tingle was wicked alright

He Loves Me...He Loves Me Not = 8/10. Foreign movie. Subtitled. I love Audrey Tautou just about as much as I love Reese Witherspoon (bunches in case you haven't been paying attention). This is one of those movies that's told from her point of view and then in the middle it switches over to his point of view. In my world, every person has someone they consider to be his or her "crazy ex." If you can watch this movie and you still think your ex is insane, then wow! You had a mighty crazy ex. Call me; we'll swap stories!

Last Thursday my co-worker gave me a dab of DuWop's Venom Gloss in Lily to try. Let me break down for you what the product description really means:

Vibrant color is spiked with a wicked tingle and a delicious shine. Each of these lip plumping glosses are enriched with a secret blend of essential oils that leave lips soft, full, and extremely kissable

Vibrant color - The color was nice. And very goopy. I had a hard time making it not run right off the bottom of my lower lip.

is spiked with a wicked tingle - If "wicked tingle" means "unable to feel lips for two hours becuase of numbness," then yes!

and a delicious shine. - It did smell nice. I didn't eat it, so I can't speak for the taste. My lips had the reflectivity of a mirror. Which is fine...except I don't have the desire to be a mirror.

Each of these lip plumping glosses - They FELT plumped. But I'm not sure if that's because I couldn't feel them or because they really were fatter.

are enriched with a secret blend of essential oils - I had no idea EMLA was an essential oil.

that leave lips soft, full - Who knows? I couldn't feel them!!!

and extremely kissable - You'd have to ask Doug on that one. Actually, I made him NOT kiss me for about 30 minutes because my lips were so numb (and in pain) that I thought I might drool on him.

Bottom line: "For external use only" definitely needs to be written on this one. I can only imagine!